Ok so I'm officially the worst blogger ever! Its been forever since I updated this ol' thing. Not like anybody ever reads it, but just in case! Plus its cathartic for me, right? Life has been so crazy. I seriously feel like my life has been flipped upside down and this is all a dream and I'm just waiting to wake up. I was talking to my mom about it the other day and if you had told me a year ago that I'd be hurrying to finish a certification program in time to get my own apartment, I'd still be working at Home Depot, and my sister would be my guardian angel, I probably would have slapped you and never spoken to you again.
A year ago seems like so long. I was in Beauty and the Beast and dating a great guy. I was stressing about school, but not super worried about it. I had awesome roommates and amazing friends. And most importantly, my sister was in Florida, performing, healthy, and happy. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy with certain aspects of my life right now. I'm in an AWESOME show in Springville with some of the most talented people I've ever had the privelege to work with and have made so many new friends in the cast. I've gotten to be good friends with people (including my bestie) that I never would have met if I had quit Home Depot last summer like I had planned. My relationships with the amazing girls I met in Florida have been put to the test and they have more than stepped up to the challenge and made our friendships so much stronger. I'm getting close to being done with my Medical Assisting program, which is going to be a huge relief.
But then, the inevitable happens, and I get hit with a huge wave of "Remember how you had a sister four months ago?" I know she wants me to be happy and continue to love my life. And part of me is and does. But I feel like the stress of everything is starting to really weigh on me and take its toll. If I want to move out of my apartment (AND I DO!), then I have to be done with my program by the time my contract is up on August 20th so I have a steady income to pay for my own place. Now this doesn't sound like a lot, but it includes a period of front office work that takes anywhere from a week to 4 weeks and an internship. Plus, all of the clinical stuff that I haven't quite finished. This show in Springville (THAT I LOVE!!) is kind of a time suck (4 hours every Monday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday). I'm trying to work enough to stay afloat so usually my day consists of school from 8-12, work from 12:30-5:30, theatre from 6:00-10:30. And I was even trying to squeeze in rehearsals for another show in Orem on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, but came to the conclusion the other day that, unfortunately, thats not very realistic. So now, I'm doing everything that I can to keep myself sane and happy, which is a pretty tall order these days. But I know its possible! I just remember that my guardian angel is sitting next to me, cheering me on, and telling me to get off Facebook and study or get ready for the show :)
And since this is kind of a Debbie Downer post, lets take a page out of Kelly Marie Hennessy's book and make a list!
The Small Things That Make Me Smile
- Dragonflies
- Ge
tting texts from my beefer
- The 'thread' on Facebook between the Florida girls that started 2 1/2 years ago and is now over 2000 messages
- Doing a pass off at school
- Getting up on that stage and becoming a skank from the 50s
- In n Out
- Talking to old friends
- Watching Gilmore Girls
- Watching Gilmore Girls and hearing a line I had forgotten about and legitly laughing out loud
- Hearing something on Grey's Anatomy that I've learned about and actually knowing what they are talking about when someone needs an oophorsalpingohysterectomy
- Newsies
- Getting back in touch with people I haven't talked to in years
- Ellen Degeneres introducing Lauren Graham in Spanish
- Matthew Morrison. Nuff said.
- Getting a good parking spot
- Wearing my stage makeup to work when I won't have time to do it at the theater
- Seeing peoples reactions to me wearing stage makeup to work
- Seize the Day set to Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. Seriously. Look it up.
- Hearing my friends laughing from the other side of the register
- Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel that is my employment at Home Depot
- Looking at one bedroom apartments
- The cute apron I plan on buying to use in my new apartment
- Tuesday nights with Aimee
- Pretty Little Liars
- Learning that everyone is secretly a theater nerd. Admit it. You love Glee.
- Getting tickets to the midnight showing of Eclipse
- Remembering the midnight showing of Twilight
- Dancing in the shower
- Knowing that I'm starting blood draws either tomorrow or Monday.
- The color pink
- Waking up to texts that say "I love you have a good day"
- Calls from Laura just to call me princess and tell me she loves me
- Texts from Chelsie that say "Why don't you work today!?"
- Texts from Chelsie that say "You work today, right?!"
- Randomly calling my mom to say hi and being able to actually hear her smile when she hears my voice
- Knowing that my parents love me
- Seeing my parents in the front row of every performance of every show I've been in, even though they live an hour away
- Hearing things that I know my sister sent to make me smile
- Seeing things that I know my sister sent to make me smile
- Feeling my sister around
- Knowing that I'll always feel my sister around
- Knowing that tomorrow is a new day :)
Love you all so much!!!
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