Goodnight

Dry away the tear. Lay aside your fears. No more pain for my love. I am here, now go to sleep.

And when the angels come, I know that they will treat you well. That they will pull you through and lift you up from all that's held you down.

There's a heaven up there and it waits just for you. So close your eyes and dream and there will be a world you once knew.

A world without the pain that has stuck with you for far too long. A world that does contain a love like mine to watch you grow strong.

And when my time arrives, please wait and make a place for me. For when I do arrive, your face should be the first face I see.

So dry away the tears. Lay aside your fears. No more pain for my love. It is time.

Now go to sleep....

I listened to that song all the way from Centerville to Pleasant Grove. Sawyer had me listen to it about 7 months ago. I can't believe you've been gone longer than you were sick. For incredible selfish reasons, I long for the time a year ago when I anxiously awaited your return home so we could help you through this and get you back to Florida as soon as your little body was ready.
More than that, I long for the times when we were young. Not a care in the world except making sure Mom and Dad didn't walk downstairs before we could change the TV from Friends to the Disney Channel and making sure we pushed record in time to get the newest episode of X-Files. I remember the nights that we stayed up later than we should have, reading Star Wars books and you taking the time to stop when I had a question, pulling out one of your many Star Wars encyclopedias and explaining it to me. I'm sorry to admit, a lot of the time I still didn't totally understand, but I wanted so badly to be like you and to make you proud that I pretended to.

Now, I hope I still make you proud. I hope that these little glimpses of dragonflies and fettucine noodles in my spaghetti are you saying that you are here with me and you are proud of what I'm doing and the things I'm accomplishing.
I know you are sitting next to me right now and playing with my hair. I could really go for one of your scalp massages right now. But, instead, I wait. However impatiently, I wait. I wait for the day that I'll be able to see your face and finally be able to hold you and hear your voice and tell you for the millionth time that I really did like the present you gave me for my 2nd birthday. I only said I didn't because it was naptime and I was cranky! I feel a little silly posting this online, but I feel like you still see it.
I miss you so much I can hardly breathe. Please never leave my side. I need you here and I always will. Friends for life, through all kinds of trouble and struggle and strife. "We all have someone special in the world and I have you." My sweet sister. I love you with all of my heart and soul.

And PS-My bra's in my ass!!!